has made my day more than receiving your letter.
It's true that you  and I have been married for seven years, although a
good woman is a far cry  from what you've been.

I watch sports so much to try to drown out your  constant nagging.

Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice when you cut off  all of your
hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You look  just
like a man!"

My mother raised me to not say anything if youcan't say  anything nice.
When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me  confused
with
MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.
I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee
because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a
coincidence
that mybrother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and
your negligee was $49.99.

After all of this, I still loved you and feltthat we could work it

out.
So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dollars,
I
quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica.

But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I
guess. I
hope you have the filling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with
your
letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was
born  Carla. I hope that's not a problem.

Signed Rich As Hell and Free!


Tony